The above notion
has come up a few times recently.
As people have spoken to me they have begun to notice that they are on an easy path, whether by choice or circumstance.
But as they begin to talk about this easy path, it becomes apparent that easy is serving as a smoke screen for boring, deadening and motivation for change, removing.
In short, it is not easy.
Perhaps it started out as easy at a time when easy was exactly what was needed.
But, somewhere along the path, it ceased to be easy.
Instead it became an illusion.
Or maybe a delusion.
But whichever ‘usion’, it is no longer one of ease.
It would appear that, that which initially appears to support us, has some kind of best before date. After which it ceases to evoke the best from within us. Instead it may cause us to trade our hunger for purpose, meaning or fulfilment for the illusion of ease.
If left unnoticed or unchallenged this easy path can slowly and subtly suck out our life blood along with any desire to persevere, grow, learn or take risks.
Ultimately, it can diminish our desire to really live. Not exist or endure, but live, as in fully.
If this happens, something within us shuts down and we begin a descent in to a zombie like state where we lose something of our capacity for full presence or participation.
We may become stuck on auto pilot, going through the motions without fully inhabiting our own experience.
If we remain here, this easy path can turn in to a bad relationship that slowly and subtly steals all confidence, leaving us unable to leave for fear of the alternative.
If this happens, our belief system may suffer.
Where we once believed that we could leave this path to do x, y or z, we may now believe that such an option is not available or viable, or that we are not capable. These new fear based beliefs may feel true enough to prevent us from even checking out their validity.
In short, the fear that attacks our beliefs may bind us to the very path that is stealing our vitality, joy, dreams and even our agency to bring about the very changes we desire.
Basically, we may become stuck on what has become a very ease free path.
Some people may call a rut. As in, you can’t go back, you can’t go forward. You are stuck in a deep rut.
When this realisation reveals itself, we do have a choice.
We can remain there. And adopt all manner of unhealthy behaviours to numb out the reality of doing so.
Or we can seek help to climb out of that rut and on to a new path.
Whilst help may come in different forms for us all, a failure to seek it will leave us knowing that we have traded our dreams or our values for the ease of a comfort zone that ceases to offer any comfort.
Once noticed, this sort of truth will nag away at us despite any efforts to suppress it. It may temporarily disappear but only to reappear a little later with a vengeance.
There are always choices.
Choose to stay and allow ourselves to becoming increasing disillusioned, disengaged and disenchanted with ourselves and our life.
Or, remind ourselves what is important and seek some support to do something about it.
If we can take steps towards a life that reflects our true values and desires, we will find it much easier to befriend the person in the mirror.
Change, as in real change, is never easy.
It does take time and it is hard.
But so is living a life that we have basically opted out of.
Will 2019 be your year to start putting in the ground work for the changes you want?
